RMM – Chapter 90 Love Arises Without Knowing How

Su Ruo heard what Xi Yuechen said, and the tightly strung string in her heart suddenly snapped.

She didn’t know why, but all the grievances and insecurity melted into tears that wouldn’t stop flowing.

Xi Yuechen had seen Su Ruo cry a few times before. Every time, it left him feeling suffocated and deeply uncomfortable. So now, seeing her tears fall so suddenly, his heart tightened with panic.

Had he been too harsh just now?

“What’s wrong?” He quickly stepped forward, reaching out to gently pull her into his arms. Guilt and heartache filled his expression. “Don’t cry.”

Since her rebirth, Su Ruo had appeared to be living a smooth and radiant life—but how could her heart truly be at peace? Everything she had now was something she had stumbled into by accident. Who knew if it might all disappear one day? She cherished the Su family, cherished the Xi family, cherished her friends, and these days filled with happiness—but above all, she cherished Xi Yuechen.

It hadn’t been a long time, but it felt as if fate had long made arrangements. In Su Ruo’s heart, Xi Yuechen’s presence had grown heavier and heavier, like a pillar that supported her as she moved through this uncertain world.

With Xi Yuechen’s personality—always aloof, never gentle, never sweet-talking, not even expressive—Su Ruo knew he held a place for her in his heart. But how much did she really mean to him? Was it as much as she hoped—equal to her own feelings? She didn’t know. She wasn’t sure about anything. Sometimes, she even wondered—was it just because she happened to be the one married to him? If she hadn’t been reborn into Su Ruo’s body, and the original Su Ruo was still around, would he have treated her the same? Or would anyone else have done just as well?

These were questions Su Ruo didn’t have answers to. No matter how many times she asked herself, it would lead nowhere. And she couldn’t ask Xi Yuechen directly. So this doubt could only be buried deep in her heart, pretending it didn’t exist. Maybe, as time went on, the answer would slowly emerge on its own.

Su Ruo had always been prone to anxiety and overthinking. Seeing Duan Wei run away heartbroken, and now facing Xi Yuechen’s anger, all her buried emotions surged to the surface. But she had to hold back. She couldn’t throw a tantrum, couldn’t lay everything out in the open to ask for the truth. She kept reminding herself—no matter what, she was still Su Ruo, still Xi Yuechen’s wife. As long as there was time, she could try slowly to walk into his heart. At the very least, wasn’t she still the most special person to him?

But who would’ve expected Xi Yuechen to say something like that? It would’ve been a miracle if she hadn’t broken down.

Her heart was aching and sour, but there was also a hint of joy—he said he would always stay by her side. That might be because of their marriage bond. But then he said he only worried about her—didn’t that mean he cared?

He wasn’t angry about her nearly messing things up, only worried that she might be in danger and wouldn’t know how to take care of herself. That’s what he meant, right?

At that moment, Su Ruo truly felt at peace. All the anxiety and grievance flowed out unabashedly, and she could finally, unreservedly, show her emotions in front of Xi Yuechen.

Xi Yuechen saw that the tears hadn’t stopped falling, but her expression didn’t quite match the sorrow. Her eyes sparkled with tears as she stubbornly glared at him, full of righteous indignation. Where was the uneasiness from earlier?

He sighed inwardly. Why is she acting like such a child? Reaching out, he gently wiped the tears from her cheeks, frowning. “Don’t cry over nothing again. It’s ugly.”

Ugly? With Su Ruo’s looks, even if she grimaced and made faces, she’d still be beautiful. But Xi Yuechen didn’t want to see her like this. Her tears felt like they were flowing directly into his heart, scorching him with their heat.

Su Ruo glared at his frowning face, both embarrassed and annoyed. She wanted to scold him, but her tightly shut lips couldn’t seem to open. Instead, she threw her arms around his waist, squeezing him so tightly that his clothes wrinkled all over.

Xi Yuechen gently patted her on the shoulder, looking puzzled. “Was I too harsh just now?”

Su Ruo took a deep breath. Her nose was filled with his unique scent. Greedily, she inhaled it again before tilting her head slightly and resting it against his chest.

Listening to the strong, steady heartbeat in her ears, Su Ruo smiled with satisfaction. “So good, Commander.” Her voice was husky and low.

“I think… meeting you in this life was truly my luck.” Before Xi Yuechen could reply, she continued, her voice sounding like a whisper to herself, “I thought you’d blame me for being reckless, for almost causing trouble. I was so scared you’d hate me. I didn’t even have the courage to stand in front of you just now.”

“I won’t hate you. Don’t overthink.” Xi Yuechen finally understood, a bit amused and a bit moved. He hadn’t expected that he could affect her emotions this much—that he mattered so much in her heart.

Su Ruo didn’t say anything more. She rubbed her head against his chest twice, then let out a satisfied sigh. Commander… unless death separates us, I’m never letting you go.

Xi Yuechen continued to gently pat her back, his eyes now filled with deep affection.

The hotel meal was delivered quickly. Su Ruo’s eyes were still a little swollen, but her face couldn’t hide the joy. Seeing the feast before her, she suddenly realized how hungry she was.

Xi Yuechen waved her over to eat. It was nearly evening already, and the little woman was probably starving. He’d heard her stomach rumbling on the phone earlier.

Now that Su Ruo was sure he wasn’t angry with her anymore—and even more importantly, she’d received an emotional response from him—she felt light and giddy, almost emboldened.

“Commander, who was that Brother Long from earlier?” she asked after swallowing a bite, her curiosity getting the better of her.

Anyone could tell that man wasn’t ordinary. And Xi Yuechen’s unusual behavior today only confirmed that something was going on. So much effort must be hiding a big secret.

“Military secret. Not to be shared.” Xi Yuechen shot her a cold glance and rejected her outright without even thinking.

“C’mon, tell me! I’m not an outsider, and I won’t tell anyone.” Su Ruo was persistent. She was always extra curious when it came to Xi Yuechen, and besides, the whole situation just felt too strange—she had to get to the bottom of it. “I mean, this didn’t look like a normal meeting. You were acting way too weird. You even pretended to be someone else, and dragged me into it as Lin Yin. Commander… are you on some big mission? Like in those TV shows—undercover in a gang or something?”

She rattled off her thoughts in one go, but Xi Yuechen remained unfazed, eating calmly as if he hadn’t heard a word.

“Commander!” she huffed, annoyed by his lack of reaction.

He glanced up at her, not flustered in the slightest, and tossed two words at her expressionlessly: “I’m not.”

Su Ruo had clearly guessed something, but Xi Yuechen wasn’t about to tell her. The truth was—he really was doing something close to undercover work. He needed to infiltrate the upper levels of Yanmen, posing as a mainland businessman looking to “buy goods,” to draw them out.

But drawing this particular snake out of its hole was no easy task. Otherwise, Yanmen wouldn’t have lasted so many years.

Drug trafficking had long been a problem in Province D, especially cross-border smuggling. It had only gotten worse in recent years, with countless shady characters involved. Catching the small fry was never enough. To stop it, they had to take down the ringleaders.

Yanmen had been thriving lately, becoming a central hub for international crime. Its growing reputation had attracted more members, and it was now a major force—arrogant and untouchable.

There was no way the government and military could allow such a threat to grow unchecked. That’s why Yanmen had become their first target in this operation.

Xi Yuechen was acting alone this time. He hadn’t even told his team members—saying only that he was attending a military meeting. The operation was top-secret. First, he had to establish trust with Yanmen. Once he gained access to the goods, the others would move in.

So when Su Ruo showed up out of nowhere, Xi Yuechen had been genuinely shocked. Thankfully, he reacted fast—otherwise, she might have accidentally ruined everything.

“Stop imagining things. Just a small case. The police requested military support, that’s all,” he said lightly, lying without hesitation. It wasn’t just because it was classified—he also didn’t want Su Ruo to worry about him.

Just a small case? That didn’t sound right. If the military was involved, how small could it really be? Su Ruo could feel he was hiding something. Could it be dangerous?

“Eat. No more questions.”

Just as Su Ruo was about to ask again, he cut her off.

She pouted and stared at his emotionless face. She could hear the firmness in his tone—it was clear he wouldn’t say more. No point in pressing further. She sighed and picked up her chopsticks again.

“Trust me. It’ll be fine.” Seeing her downcast expression, Xi Yuechen couldn’t help but speak up near the end of the meal.

“You’re not Superman. If there’s danger, how can it be fine?” Su Ruo shot back, putting down her chopsticks and looking at him. “Commander, I know you’re capable and careful, but please be careful. I can’t do anything to help—you’re the one taking all the risks. All I can do is care and remind you. Just do your job. I’ll always be behind you, supporting you!”

Toward the end, she smiled cheekily, as if she were teasing. But Xi Yuechen could hear the sincerity in her voice. He was quietly moved and nodded with a smile.

Worry aside, all Su Ruo could do was support him. What else could she do? She was a military wife. She couldn’t ask him to defy orders or leave the army. All she could do was compromise—to ease his mind so he could fully focus on his mission. That way, he’d have a better chance of success.

Soldiers are born to sweat, bleed, and sacrifice. As for military wives, their role is to support them. What hardships couldn’t she endure? Nothing could be harder than what he faced.

Su Ruo had accepted this long ago. Though she still worried, it wasn’t so hard to accept anymore. As long as he came back safely, nothing else mattered. Not honors, not rank.

After all…
Love arises without knowing how.