TVSFPAG -Chapter 174 I Am Certain—I Don’t Want to Lose You

With just one sentence, Bai Yu exposed her, and Song Yunfei felt like she wanted to crawl back into the little yellow chick costume all over again.

She glared at Bai Yu and said unhappily, “Shut your mouth!”

Bai Yu sighed and shook his head in a deliberately sorrowful manner. “Now you’re living the good life, but I’m the miserable one. From now on, I’ll have to learn how to use a sewing machine and patch my own clothes alone.”

Song Yunfei paused, then subconsciously looked toward Chu Jinhan, a hint of probing hidden in her eyes.

The moment she looked over, Chu Jinhan happened to look away, deliberately avoiding eye contact with her.

The atmosphere suddenly became awkward.

She had only just been forgiven—how could she immediately ask for Bai Yu’s mercy?

Better to wait a bit longer.

Thinking of this, she turned to Bai Yu and said, “Hurry up and change your clothes. You’ve already dirtied the sofa!”

The two of them had rolled around in mud in the courtyard earlier, and later Bai Yu had been chased all over by Chu Jinhan. At this point, he was in quite a sorry state.

Bai Yu chuckled, crossing his legs again, his tone teasing. “What, am I interrupting your little world together? Cuihua, you really are heartless. I went through so much for you, and you turn your back on me just like that?”

Song Yunfei noticed Chu Jinhan’s expression wasn’t looking too good, so she quickly shot Bai Yu frantic signals, lowering her voice, “Stop talking already!”

Without giving Bai Yu another chance to speak, she quickly walked up to Chu Jinhan and grabbed his arm. “You haven’t eaten yet, right? I’ll take you out to eat.”

Bai Yu spoke up again, “What about me?”

“Isn’t there leftover food in the fridge? Just make do.” Song Yunfei replied without turning her head.

“You…” Bai Yu was amused by her reaction, but didn’t press further. He simply muttered, “Silly,” under his breath.

No one knew who he was referring to.

“Let’s go.”

She pulled Chu Jinhan along, and he stood up very cooperatively.

Song Yunfei took an umbrella from the doorway, hooked her arm with his, and walked out together.

Outside, a light drizzle was still falling. The ground was damp, and the cold wind brushed against their faces, carrying a faint sting.

Chu Jinhan took the umbrella from her hand, opened it, and held it steadily above both their heads, subtly tilting it toward her side.

Song Yunfei looked up at him. The wind carried a faint lavender scent from his body, and that familiar fragrance filled the empty space in her heart that had been missing for the past two months.

She saw the familiar look in his eyes again—not the high-and-mighty, condescending gaze that looked at people like they were beneath him.

It was as if the Chu Jinhan who had once lived with her in that small rented apartment had truly returned.

She curved her eyes slightly at him.

Chu Jinhan naturally pulled her into his arms, looking down at her. “Where should we go?”

“Not sure. Let’s just walk around.”

This area was relatively rural, far from the hustle and bustle of the city. The scenery was quiet and serene—perfect for a slow, leisurely walk.

Song Yunfei still had many questions in her heart. She hadn’t dared to ask them in front of Bai Yu earlier, and even now that they were alone, the words still felt a little hard to bring up.

After a moment of silence, she finally gathered her courage and asked, “Have your memories fully recovered now?”

Chu Jinhan gave a soft “mm.”

“Then… you were so harsh before—was it because your memories hadn’t fully returned?”

At this question, Chu Jinhan stopped walking. His arm around her tightened slightly as he fell into silence.

After a long while, he finally spoke uncertainly, his tone carrying a hint of self-doubt:

“I was… very harsh?”

“More than harsh.” Song Yunfei pursed her lips, recalling his past behavior, her tone carrying a trace of grievance. “You kept threatening me—saying I’d be dead if I lied to you, even saying you’d break my legs. How is that not harsh?”

Chu Jinhan fell silent, his gaze dropping to the wet ground as he began to reflect.

They continued walking for a while longer before Song Yunfei heard him quietly apologize:

“Sorry. I may have expressed myself poorly. I… never intended to hurt you.”

Song Yunfei looked at him in surprise, her eyes full of unexpected emotion. “Really? But before, I always felt like you were very distant from me.”

Ever since Chu Jinhan returned from his trip, whenever he looked at her, it felt as if he was gazing from another world entirely.

It felt as if they were no longer on the same plane of existence, no longer in an equal relationship.

Even if he was doing the same things as before, Song Yunfei could clearly sense the condescending superiority he carried.

That feeling made her feel as though there was an insurmountable chasm between them. Even if there were emotions in her heart, they were hard to fill—and she didn’t dare to harbor any extra expectations or fantasies.

Chu Jinhan tightened his grip on her hand, the warmth of his palm spreading to her. He lowered his voice and said, “It’s my fault. I never thought things through properly.”

Song Yunfei smiled, a hint of relief in her eyes. “I understand. For someone like you—a favored son of heaven—this kind of thing is hard to accept.

If it were me, I’m not even sure I could easily forgive someone who hurt me like that.”

She suddenly turned around to face Chu Jinhan.

Their eyes met. The cold wind carried fine drizzle, slanting through the umbrella and landing on their cheeks. The cool touch only made the atmosphere under the umbrella feel even warmer.

Song Yunfei said seriously, “Chu Jinhan, the fact that you came here—it really surprised me. It’s hard for me to believe.”

“However, I know that for you to say those words, you must have made a great deal of determination. So no matter how many concerns the future holds, I’m willing to face them bravely with you.”

Chu Jinhan gazed at her deeply, holding her hand tightly.

After a moment, he slowly spoke. “Xiao Xian told me to figure out what I truly want. Since then, I’ve been thinking about that question every day.”

Song Yunfei looked at him curiously. “Have you figured it out?”

“Yes.” He leaned slightly closer, his voice deep and solemn. “Yunfei, I’m certain—I don’t want to lose you.

Not because of the illusions from when I lost my memory, not because of responsibility or habit, and not merely because of love itself.

But because it’s you. No matter what identity or in what way you appear in my life, I think in the end, you will always make me lose my composure.”

Song Yunfei froze.

She had never known that she was so important in his heart.

A warm surge rose within her chest. Feeling a little shy, she turned her head away, her ears quietly tinged with a faint blush.

“There’s no way I’m that good…” she said softly. “You’ve become so good at saying sweet things now. Did you go somewhere to train for that?”

Seeing her reddened ears, a faint smile appeared in Chu Jinhan’s dark eyes.

He raised his hand and gently brushed the tip of her burning ear with his fingertip. “I didn’t train anywhere. Because everything I’m saying is the truth.”

Song Yunfei’s face turned even redder. She muttered quietly, “You’re teasing me again.”

“I’m not.” Chu Jinhan’s voice was especially serious. “You just don’t realize how good you are.”

This was the first time Song Yunfei had heard such direct affirmation of herself from someone other than her family.

Her eyes suddenly grew moist, tears welling up.

Just as she was trying hard to hold them back, Chu Jinhan had already pulled her tightly into his embrace.

The tears that had yet to fall were absorbed by his coat, leaving a darker wet mark on the fabric.

“Come back with me, alright? Come back and finish the things you promised me.”

Song Yunfei sniffled and nodded firmly in his arms. “Mm.”

The light drizzle continued to drift intermittently, but within his warm embrace, the wind and rain were shut out completely—it didn’t feel cold at all.

Song Yunfei suddenly felt that London was actually quite romantic. Everything around her—the grass and the trees—seemed vivid and full of life.

Chu Jinhan slightly tilted the umbrella to block the slanting rain.

He lowered his head and leaned closer to her, his warm breath brushing against her forehead.

“We haven’t seen each other for two months.”

Hearing this, Song Yunfei instinctively lifted her head—and coincidentally, her lips brushed against his.

Before she could say anything, he had already wrapped his arm around her waist and kissed her deeply.

Song Yunfei stiffened slightly.

Out in the open, she still felt somewhat restrained, worried that passersby might see them—what difference would that be from doing something embarrassing on the street?

But very quickly, his familiar presence enveloped her. The possessiveness and tenderness between their lips left her unable to think any further.

She slowly closed her eyes, wrapping her arms around his waist, and together with him, sank into this vast, open world.