LOT – Chapter 39 Dad, Get Down on All Fours, I’ll Ride You Home While You Crawl!

Seeing all the onlookers who were gleefully watching the drama unfold, Minister Lin said expressionlessly, “None of your children are much older than mine—how about you let them ride on your shoulders when you go home too?”

At that, everyone immediately fell silent. Forget it, forget it—we can’t afford to mess with this one!

The system was still desperately trying to talk sense into Lin Mo, but drunk Lin Mo was in full “impervious to reason” mode.

System: You’re a whole grown person now—are you trying to send your dad to an early grave?!

Lin Mo: My dad is in the prime of his life! How does this send him to the grave? I used to ride on his shoulders as a kid—why not now too?!

Everyone around quickly nodded in their hearts. Yeah, why not now? Look how excited she is—just let her ride!

Minister Lin looked down at his daughter sitting on the ground and felt nothing but despair.

“Get up this instant! You were only a toddler when you did that before—you’re nearly sixteen now!”

Lin Mo pondered seriously over what her father said, then came up with an incredibly “brilliant” solution.

“Daddy, if I can’t ride on your shoulders, then just get down on all fours—I’ll ride your back and you can crawl home!”

System: Pffft!!

Everyone else: “Pwahahahaha!”

This time, they couldn’t hold it in at all.

Not far away, the Crown Prince and the two other princes were completely at a loss for words.  The Third Prince wiped away tears of laughter and sighed, “This little Lord Lin is truly a rare treasure. What do you think Minister Lin will do—shoulder ride or piggyback?”

The Crown Prince thought for a moment. “He’ll probably just carry her by the collar. He’s brought her to court like that plenty of times.”

Second Prince: “I think he’ll actually crawl! Think outside the box! Is there anything this little Lord Lin won’t do?”

Lin Mo’s eyes sparkled as she sat on the ground, looking expectantly at her father. “Daddy, hurry up and get down! Let’s go home already!”

System: Host… you’re really the ultimate filial daughter. Filial enough to kill your own father.

Lin Mo didn’t catch the sarcasm and proudly assumed it was praise.

Lin Mo: Of course! I’m the most filial daughter ever!

Minister Lin looked at this troublesome girl on the floor and suddenly felt a pain in his chest and a dizzy spell coming on.

This damned child kept begging him to get on all fours so she could ride him home.

When she saw her dad still not moving, Lin Mo took matters into her own hands. She crawled over to his feet and latched onto his leg.

“Daddy, hurry up and get down! If you crawl fast enough, maybe we’ll even make it home in time for Mom’s late-night snack!”

The people around were practically dying of laughter. If they had a daughter like this, they’d probably be driven to an early grave—but someone else having a daughter like this? Absolutely hilarious.

They could hardly imagine how lively the Minister’s residence must be on a daily basis.

Minister Lin tried his best to ignore the looks he was getting and directly hoisted his troublesome daughter up, wrapping an arm around her shoulder to keep her in check.

Lin Mo grumbled unhappily, “Dad, this is really uncomfortable for me. If you hold me like this I’ll end up throwing up. I don’t want to walk home on my own!”

Through gritted teeth, Minister Lin said, “If you won’t walk home yourself, I’ll leave you here to sleep on the spot!”

Hearing that, Lin Mo pouted in grievance. “Dad, you don’t love me anymore. You used to let me ride on your shoulders or your back when I was little. Why not now?”

“Why won’t you just get down and carry me home like that?”

The father and daughter bantered as they walked, Minister Lin answering between clenched teeth, “Because I’d like to preserve what little dignity and life I have left!”

Lin Mo: “I wasn’t trying to take your life.”

Minister Lin: “Letting you ride on my shoulders is taking my life! And carrying you home on my back is the death of my dignity! I’ve worked so hard all these years—can’t you cut me a little slack? Don’t make me lose face at my age!”

Even the system felt a twinge of sympathy hearing Minister Lin’s heartfelt words.

System: Children really are karmic debts from past lives… Good thing I can’t have any.

Once the two left, there wasn’t much left to watch. Hidden behind a palace gate, the emperor was nearly in tears from laughing.

The palace maids and eunuchs behind him were all speechless—His Majesty was actually hiding in a corner to secretly watch a minister’s family drama. Who would believe it if they said it out loud? But that was what he did.

“The Minister of Rites actually treats his kid pretty well. He even played with them like that when they were small. Not bad, not bad.”

Emperor Xuande had already thought well of Minister Lin, and now his opinion only improved.

A man who truly cared for his child was unlikely to be bad in other aspects. And this Lin Mo girl’s lawless behavior? That didn’t come from nowhere—it was definitely the result of being spoiled by the Lin family.

It took Minister Lin all the strength he could muster to drag his troublesome daughter home.

When Madam Lin saw her tipsy daughter and her husband’s dark expression, she immediately guessed that something embarrassing had happened—again. Most likely something the girl had caused.

“Quickly take Second Miss to her room. Assign someone to watch her tonight,” she ordered.
Drunk people needed careful attention—if she vomited in her sleep and it blocked her airway, it could be dangerous.

Once Lin Mo was taken away, Minister Lin collapsed into a chair, completely drained.

Seeing him like that, Madam Lin laughed and asked, “What happened? Was the banquet a success? Mo’er didn’t cause any trouble, did she?”

Minister Lin scoffed and, recalling the night’s chaos, figured this had to be the most outrageous one yet—though with that daughter of his, who knew what tomorrow might bring.

He recounted the whole night to his wife in vivid detail, especially the part where that little scoundrel wanted to ride him home.

Madam Lin: … She just knew that nothing involving that girl would be simple—but why did she also find it so absurdly funny?

Lin Ran and Lin Qi heard about Lin Mo getting drunk and came by the next morning to check on her. Finding her still asleep, they left quietly.

The system sighed as it looked at Lin Mo lying in bed.

System: She really racked up a lot of energy for me last night—I’m completely self-sufficient now!

Lin Mo slept straight through until noon. As for the events of the previous night—she’d already come to terms with them. After all, it wasn’t her first time getting drunk.

Seeing how calm she was, the system was a little curious.

System: Host, why are you acting so normal today? Last time you were crying like the world was ending. Did something snap in you this time?

Lin Mo: It’s called experience. Nothing shocking about it. I think I’ve improved a lot.

System: You mean your alcohol tolerance?

Lin Mo smiled slightly and said,

“No—I mean this time, I didn’t try to ride someone else’s son home.”

The system paused for three seconds before replying flatly:

System: But the one you tried to ride this time… was your own father…