The guest reception hall of the Great Qi capital.
This was Great Qi’s designated place for receiving foreign envoys, sprawling in size, with ornate beams and painted halls, luxurious to the extreme.
Li An stood at the entrance of the reception hall, taking a deep breath.
Since this Ninth Princess from Northern Yan was so infatuated with him at first sight and couldn’t stop thinking about him…
Then don’t blame him for being impolite!
Tonight, he would give this princess a show she wouldn’t forget.
“Sir, are you really going in alone?”
Jin Daya asked quietly from behind.
“Of course. The princess said she only invited me.”
Li An rolled his eyes. “Why would you go in? To be a third wheel?”
“What’s a third wheel?”
“Don’t ask so many questions.”
Li An adjusted his collar. “You just wait by the door. If anything happens, report it immediately.”
“Report… what? To whom? Miss Hongmei or Miss Liu?”
“Report…”
Li An paused. “Forget it. If they come, it’ll just make things more chaotic. Stay here and don’t run off.”
With that, he strode into the reception hall.
…
Inside the reception hall.
Murong Xue had been waiting for a long time.
Tonight, she wore a moon-white long dress, with a white jade hairpin in her bun. Her entire presence was dignified yet alluring, cold yet soft.
The Ninth Princess clearly had been taught well in the palace, knowing exactly how to dress to appeal to men.
From afar, alluring; up close, dignified; scrutinize closely, seductive; glance again, elegant and cold.
Tell me, any man wouldn’t be moved by such a woman?
Naturally, Li An was no exception. The moment he saw Murong Xue’s outfit, he almost drooled. But after years of scrolling through livestreams with countless beauty filters, his mind quickly steadied.
“Sir Li, please sit.”
She smiled slightly and gestured.
Li An scanned the banquet table.
Wow—full of delicacies, all kinds of exotic meats and seafood.
Fine wine, incense burners, and…
Musicians?
A group of palace maids holding various instruments sat quietly in a corner, waiting.
This princess was really putting on a show.
All of this… she brought from Northern Yan herself…
But…
The bigger the show, the more lavish the hospitality, the more he had to ruin it!
Li An reminded himself constantly: do not be dazzled by the fancy display.
Remember, you are here to disgrace yourself!
You must act like an incurable pervert!
A talentless idiot!
A scoundrel so repulsive the princess will want to call off the engagement!
With that thought, Li An plopped into the main seat, crossed his legs, and put his foot directly on the chair.
“Your Highness, this banquet of yours is impressive!”
He glanced at the dishes. “But looking around, where’s the roast leg of lamb?”
Murong Xue blinked slightly.
“Roast… leg of lamb?”
“Yes, roast leg of lamb!”
Li An pounded the table theatrically. “Princess, aren’t you from Northern Yan? Isn’t it famous for lamb? And here, not even a single leg? Stingy!”
The maids’ faces changed.
This… is too rude!
The princess personally arranged this banquet, and he dares complain about no lamb?
And even calls her stingy?
All these delicacies, this elegant music, and it’s not worth a single leg of lamb?
A maid next to Murong Xue was about to protest but was stopped with a raised hand.
“Someone, check the kitchen. See if there’s a leg of lamb.”
A faint smile touched Murong Xue’s lips. “If Sir Li likes it, it must be provided.”
Li An was momentarily stunned.
This princess, she’s really that patient?
Why isn’t she angry?
Wasn’t she supposed to be beautiful but willful?
According to his plan, she should have flounced off in a huff at his rudeness!
Why is she so easily meeting his demands?
No, he had to push further!
“No roast leg of lamb! Then I can’t take it. I’m hungry! Hungry! Then I won’t be polite!”
He grabbed a piece of braised meat and shoved it into his mouth.
Juices dripped down the corners of his mouth as he chewed.
Not bothering to wipe it off, he continued eating with an oily face.
“Hmm, this meat isn’t bad.”
Mouth full, he spoke unclearly. “But… too little salt, flavor isn’t enough.”
The maids stared at his eating.
This… this is the new top scholar?
The person in charge of the International Expo?
Eating like a bandit?
Ding!
【Host Li An deliberately behaves rudely, harming Great Qi’s image!】
【Northern Yan delegation’s impression of Great Qi decreases!】
【Great Qi National Fortune -200】
【Current National Fortune: 54,379】
Li An saw the system prompt and was elated.
It dropped! It finally dropped!
This damn system is finally working correctly!
Exactly as it should—drop, drop, drop…
His performance was working!
Keep going!
“Princess,” Li An wiped his greasy hands on his mouth. “Why is your wine so weak? Tastes like water, no kick!”
He grabbed the wine jug and poured it straight into his mouth.
Wine dripped down, soaking his front.
“Ah, refreshing!”
He set the jug down and belched.
“Princess, your Northern Yan wine can’t compare. Not as strong as our Treasury Office’s ‘roast knife’ brew!”
Murong Xue watched Li An’s antics, her eyes flickering with a trace of surprise.
“Sir Li,” she said slowly, “I’ve heard your poetic talent is astounding. Could you compose a poem tonight, to enlighten this princess?”
Li An was stuffing a chicken drumstick into his mouth and almost choked.
Compose a poem?
You want me to compose a poem?
I’m eating like Zhu Bajie, and you want me to write a poem?
“Princess, you jest,” Li An laughed awkwardly. “Though I’m the new top scholar, I’m really just a rough man. Poetry? Not my skill.”
“You’re too modest, Sir Li.”
Murong Xue smiled lightly. “I heard that during the palace exam, your ‘Petition to Persuade the Emperor to Surrender’ shocked the court, compelling His Majesty to personally appoint you top scholar.”
“Such talent can’t be described as ‘rough,’” she added.
Li An: …
This princess did her homework too well.
She even knows about my palace exam?
“That’s all exaggerated. The truth is I just gave the emperor a good scolding. Um… made him enjoy it! That’s why they crowned me top scholar.”
Li An continued his cover-up.
“If I could get top scholar just by scolding the emperor, then naturally you should see my rhetorical skills in action. Princess, you should witness my true talent yourself.”
Murong Xue spoke softly, “This banquet tonight is to see Sir Li’s brilliance. You won’t disappoint this princess, will you?”
Li An felt trapped.
This princess is deliberately doing this!
She wants him to compose a poem!
But if he actually writes one…
Wait!
Li An’s eyes lit up.
Who said a poem had to be a good one?
He could write a terrible poem!
No, not just terrible…
A lewd, decadent poem!
A work about brothels, about wine and revelry!
To show the princess that Li An is just a pleasure-seeking playboy!
Decided, Li An thought to himself.
“Since Princess is so kind, I shall disgrace myself.”
He staggered to his feet, swaying as if drunk.
Murong Xue signaled the musicians to get ready and began playing the zither herself.
Gentle zither music filled the air, instantly adding elegance.
Li An cleared his throat.
He scanned his memory for poems.
Decadent…
Depicting wine and pleasure…
To make listeners think he’s a carefree rake…
Got it!
“Beyond the hills, beyond the towers, how long does the West Lake singing and dancing last?”
Li An began, voice lazy.
“The warm breeze intoxicates the visitors, turning Hangzhou into Bianzhou.”
He deliberately hiccupped after finishing.
“Princess, how is this poem?”
A smug smile tugged at his lips. “It depicts my usual life—music, wine, indulgence, living like a god!”
“Now that Great Qi is so peaceful, shouldn’t it be like this? Forget Northern Yan or Nanyue, we just drink and play!”
He leaned toward Murong Xue, blowing his drunken breath onto her flawless rosy skin.
“Princess, what do you think? Shall we live for today, drunk for today?”
He winked seductively, the very image of a lecher.
Ding!
【Host Li An publicly recites a decadent poem, showing his playboy nature!】
【Northern Yan princess and her attendants, musicians, dancers all have extremely poor impressions of Li An! Great Qi’s image plummets! National fortune decreases!】
【Great Qi National Fortune -300】
【Current National Fortune: 54,079】
Li An saw the system prompt and grinned.
It dropped again!
Exactly as planned!
Soon, the princess would be disgusted and leave, canceling the marriage. The national fortune would tumble further!
However…
He waited for a long while, but there was no scolding, no disgust—nothing like he had expected.
The guest hall was completely silent.
Li An found it odd and looked up at Murong Xue.
She had stopped playing the zither, her phoenix-like eyes fixed steadily on him.
That gaze…
Something felt off.
“Your Highness?”
Li An tentatively called out.
“Mountains beyond mountains, buildings beyond buildings, when will the songs and dances of West Lake ever end…”
Murong Xue softly repeated the lines, her voice trembling slightly.
“The warm wind intoxicates the visitors, turning Hangzhou into Bianzhou…”
She slowly stood up, reciting, and her eyes were glistening with tears!
Li An: ???
Why are you crying?
I already said it was an obscene song—why are you crying?
“Lord Li…”
Murong Xue’s voice choked.
“I… I finally understand.”
Understand what? I don’t understand anything!
Li An was utterly bewildered.
“Understand why Lord Li always presents himself as greedy and lustful.”
Murong Xue took a deep breath, her voice full of admiration.
“Because Lord Li… suffers too much.”
Suffers?
What am I suffering from? The only suffering I feel is from idiots like you overanalyzing everything and imagining nonsense all day!
“Lord Li seems to be describing songs and dances in prosperity, but in fact, you are satirizing the false prosperity of Great Qi!”
Seeing Li An’s expression, Murong Xue became even more excited, convinced she had uncovered the delicate, worried heart behind his outward demeanor.
“When will the songs and dances of West Lake end? You are asking the officials of Great Qi, when will you stop this life of excess?”
“The warm wind intoxicates the visitors, meaning the court is blinded by this fake age of peace!”
“Turning Hangzhou into Bianzhou…”
Her voice suddenly grew heavy.
“Bianzhou… that was the old capital of the previous dynasty, later trampled by our iron cavalry from the northern steppes!”
“Lord Li is warning Great Qi!”
“Do not forget the threat of Northern Yan! Do not drown in the fleeting prosperity before your eyes!”
Li An: !!!
What the hell are you talking about?
That’s not what I meant… I only wanted to portray myself as a debauched man! How did it become some patriotic, worrying-about-the-country speech?
“Lord Li…”
Murong Xue walked up to Li An, staring at him steadily.
“So your usual greed, lust, and reckless behavior are all a mask for inner suffering.”
“You see everything too clearly, too painfully clearly.”
“So you can only numb yourself in this way.”
Li An: …
It’s over, over, over.
This princess’s imagination is stronger than even the Great Qi emperor’s!
I’m obviously humiliating myself, acting like a rake!
How did it turn into me being a patriotic genius?
Ding!
【Murong Xue misinterprets Li An’s poem!】
【Believes Li An is warning Great Qi to be vigilant in times of peace!】
【Northern Yan princess’s favor toward Li An soars!】
【Great Qi national fortune +1000】
【Current national fortune: 55,079】
Li An looked at the system notification and froze.
National fortune… went up again?
And it jumped by a thousand this time?
He had spent so much effort humiliating himself, and after several rounds it only decreased a few hundred. But now, just reciting a poem casually, and the national fortune goes up a thousand?
“Sir, such talent.”
Murong Xue bowed slowly to Li An.
“Xue’er admires you.”
Her voice no longer had the earlier playfulness or teasing.
Instead, it was sincere respect.
Li An: …
He just wanted to crawl into a hole.
“Your Highness, you flatter me. I just wrote it casually…”
“No need for modesty.”
Murong Xue cut him off.
“Although I am a woman, I understand a bit of literature. Every word in your poem is a gem, every line bleeds. Only someone with the mind for the world could write such verses.”
Li An: …
Mind for the world? I’m just a spy trying to ruin the country!
Damn it! From now on, I can’t recite poems from textbooks.
No, I also can’t recite poems I memorized from my past life.
Any poem that’s passed down through the ages can be twisted by these overthinking idiots.
But… if I don’t recite those poems, do I have to improvise poetry on the spot?
What a headache.
“Someone!”
Murong Xue suddenly shouted.
“Change the wine!”
“Tonight, I want to drink with the gentleman!”
The maids hurriedly replaced the wine with the strongest mare’s milk wine of Northern Yan.
Murong Xue personally poured a cup and handed it to Li An with both hands.
“Sir, please.”
Li An looked at the cup, wanting to cry but unable to shed a tear.
He came tonight to humiliate himself!
How did it suddenly turn into the princess generously and passionately toasting him with admiration?
This script is wrong!
The banquet continued.
Murong Xue kept toasting Li An, her eyes full of a girl’s admiration for an idol.
Li An drank, increasingly frustrated.
His plan tonight had completely failed.
Not only did he fail to make the princess disgusted, he made her admire him even more.
What the hell is wrong with this logic?!
He drank greedily, the princess called him genuine!
He recited a poem casually, the princess said he was patriotic!
Everything he did had the opposite effect!
At that moment…
A commotion came from outside the door.
“Imperial edict—”
A high-pitched voice rang out.
Murong Xue’s expression changed, and she quickly stood.
Li An also got up, half sobered by the interruption.
An imperial edict?
At this hour?
The door curtain was lifted, and a man in eunuch robes entered.
Li An focused and saw it was Xiaodezi, the emperor’s personal eunuch.
“His Majesty commands—”
Xiaodezi cleared his throat.
“Li An, Princess Murong Xue of Northern Yan, and Lady Liu Wanqing of the State Uncle’s mansion, are to enter the palace for a banquet tomorrow!”
Li An froze.
Enter the palace for a banquet?
The emperor wants to see us?
“Finished delivering?”
he asked.
“Yes.”
Xiaodezi nodded, then leaned close to Li An and whispered,
“Lord Li, His Majesty also has a word for you personally.”
“What word?”
“The emperor says…”
Xiaodezi paused, “…make sure Lord Li performs well and does not disgrace Great Qi.”
Li An: …
Disgrace Great Qi?
I’d be happy to disgrace Great Qi!
But the problem is, even if I wanted to, I can’t!
Murong Xue, upon hearing “enter the palace for a banquet,” showed a flicker of surprise in her eyes.
The emperor of Great Qi is personally involved?
Li An’s status in Great Qi was apparently higher than she imagined.
“Lord Li,” she looked at him, “it seems we will meet again tomorrow.”
Li An smiled wryly.
“Yes, Your Highness.”
He had no expectations left.
Tonight’s attempt was a total failure.
Tomorrow, entering the palace…
Thinking of the little emperor, that master of overthinking…
Thinking of Liu Wanqing, that love-struck fool who always gets in the way…
And this Northern Yan princess with max-level reading comprehension…
Three overthinking monsters together, how could he possibly do well?
Ding!
【Northern Yan princess Murong Xue favor reached “Admiration”!】
【Liu Wanqing vs. Murong Xue “Rivalry Battle” about to escalate!】
【Shura Arena PLUS mode activated! Li An, as Great Qi’s top scholar, boosts national prestige and fortune!】
【Great Qi national fortune +200】
【Current national fortune: 55,279】
Li An looked at the system notice, completely despairing.
It went up again?
How is it still going up?
He came tonight to ruin the country!
In the end, the national fortune actually increased by seven hundred???
“You want me to humiliate myself, and you make me showcase my talent?!”
Li An cursed silently in his heart.
This world… does it even have any sense of justice left?
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