EMHTC -Chapter 58 Vice Minister Tea! You Forced Me to Do This!

Xu Yanmiao suddenly heard someone shouting from outside—

“Scrolls can be aged!”

Xu Yanmiao froze for a moment, still processing the words, when three or five Jinyiwei (Imperial Guards) had already rushed out.

A while later, they returned, looking uneasy and empty-handed. Clearly, they hadn’t caught anyone.

Meanwhile, the citizens outside the yamen had already been stirred up.

“Is the emperor trying to cover for the princess and her prince consort?”

“After all, he is royal son-in-law. Don’t we always say, ‘A son-in-law is half a son’?”

“That’s true. And His Majesty is the princess’s father! If he wants to help her cover this up, he absolutely can!”

“This feels like that play about Ji Gu! Except Ji Gu had Qi Qingtian, and this guy has nothing! How pitiful!”

Ji Gu was the most popular character from The Case of the Prince Consort, a recent opera widely performed across Daxia. In the opera, Ji Gu was the unfortunate and pitiable original wife of the prince consort. She was filial to his parents and cared for his children, simple, kind, and loyal—qualities that endeared her to audiences.

In the story, when she sued the prince consort, the princess tried to use her status to shield him, but a righteous official named Qi defied authority and used the imperial sword to execute the prince consort in public.

It was the classic tale of punishing evil and promoting justice, beloved by the masses.

But now that life seemed to be imitating art, it felt like reality was heading toward the opposite conclusion.

—The public, understandably, found this unsettling.

Inside the Jibei Prince’s mansion, there was a deep, tranquil forest. In the middle of the woods stood a wooden house where the Prince of Jibei would retreat whenever he needed to think. Dismissing his attendants, he would sit cross-legged inside, concentrating in solitude.

“High Jianyi?”

The wooden window was half-open, and the rustling leaves cast dappled shadows over the Prince of Jibei’s face, light and shadow intermingling.

“Feeling uneasy now, aren’t you? My kill shot, prepared two years in advance, was specifically designed to strike where it hurts. I even had someone write an opera to spread ahead of time. Now the citizens are furious at the prince consort for being a wife-murdering child-killer. And suddenly realizing that the opera mirrors real life? Let’s see how you’ll protect your daughter and son-in-law now!”

“And that crown prince of yours!”

Just thinking about the crown prince made the Prince of Jibei grind his teeth in anger.

How could someone like Gao Xian exist?! Despite the precariousness of his position, he remained unbothered. Even being provoked into a leg injury, he stayed composed and unfazed. Such deep scheming was something the Prince of Jibei had rarely encountered in his life.

How could High Jianyi deserve such an outstanding son?!

“I refuse to believe it! Your sister has been deceived, and you, who care for her the most, won’t get angry! Won’t be so mad you cough up blood!”

The crown prince, perfectly healthy both physically and mentally, cautiously glanced at the old emperor.

“Father…”

Are you okay?

You haven’t been angered to the point of coughing up blood, have you?

The old emperor inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly: “I…”

Having spent the past two days helping the old emperor review memorials, Xu Yanmiao reflexively thought: 【I am fine.】

The old emperor: “…”

His words got stuck in his throat.

Then, irritated, the old emperor said, “I am not fine!”

【The old emperor is so pitiful…】

Xu Yanmiao had no idea why the emperor was so insistent that he wasn’t fine.

Right now, Xu Yanmiao felt nothing but sympathy for the old emperor.

【It’s understandable he’s uneasy, suddenly finding out his son-in-law has a first wife. Though I’m not sure whether it’s worse to mistakenly believe the son-in-law has a first wife or to discover that the daughter is actually the first wife but the son-in-law is secretly a woman.】

The old emperor ground his teeth.

Neither! None of this is okay!

Why couldn’t he have a normal son-in-law?

Why couldn’t his daughters have normal marriages?!

Frowning, he glanced at the courtroom below and suddenly froze.

—Perhaps it was because of his earlier statement, “I am not fine,” but his eldest daughter, sharp and competitive, rarely showing her softer side, was now looking at him with a rare trace of guilt.

The old emperor coughed lightly and began, “Fangling…” but faltered halfway.

What was he supposed to say? When did you find out your prince consort was a woman?

Surely, it couldn’t be when you were investigating in his hometown and decided to just go along with it?

“Father…” Princess Fangling’s tone was firm. “The prince consort absolutely did not abandon a wife and children! You can rest assured!”

Rest assured about what? That the prince consort wasn’t second-hand goods?

The old emperor exchanged a look with Princess Fangling and immediately grasped her true meaning—

Father! Don’t worry! I will never let myself—or our family—lose face!

Princess Fangling’s gaze suddenly shifted to the woman below, sharp as a blade. “You’re just a peasant woman, without means or resources. How did you travel all the way from Baoding to Liaodong? Why didn’t you report to the authorities inland but instead crossed the Bohai Sea to Fuzhou City?”

The woman seemed startled by the princess’s stern tone. She swayed and fell to the ground, trembling as she stammered, “I… I…”

She repeated herself but couldn’t manage to say anything coherent.

Xu Yanmiao almost wanted to applaud the princess.

【Exactly, exactly! From Baoding to Fuzhou is nearly two thousand miles! If she wanted to report to the authorities, why not just head to the capital instead of coming all the way here?】

【It really doesn’t make sense!】

【Besides, the prince consort is the governor of Liaodong. Wouldn’t you investigate where your enemy is before reporting them? What if you encountered collusion between officials?】

Your thoughts are excellent, but they’re mine now.

The old emperor gave a meaningful look to one of his ministers, who immediately stood up and echoed the princess’s questioning. “Do you know that the prince consort is the governor of Liaodong? Were you not afraid of him wielding absolute power there?”

The woman hesitated, glancing nervously at the emperor and the princess. Then she lowered her head, staring at her toes, and stammered again, “Yes… yes… the official is right. It’s all my fault for not thinking it through… And as for the princess… since His Majesty says there’s evidence, then there must be evidence. I… I must have wrongly accused the prince consort.”

The crowd, having likened her to the tragic “Ji Gu” from the opera, became even more emotional. Although they dared not voice grievances against the emperor, they shouted passionately that justice would prevail and urged her not to give up.

The woman turned back to face the crowd, her expression full of gratitude. Then she quickly turned away, lowering her head, tears streaming silently.

Xu Yanmiao was in awe.

【What a performance!】

Xu Yanmiao grew anxious.

【Miss Tea, go on! Show her what a real tea master looks like!】

The Vice Minister of Rites: ???

Excuse me?

With a sharp crack of his knuckles, the stern and imposing “Miss Tea” remained expressionless.

The Assistant Minister of the Imperial Clan couldn’t resist nudging the Vice Minister of Rites with his elbow, winking mischievously. “Go on, Miss Tea!”

The Vice Minister of Rites narrowed his eyes, chuckling coldly. “Oh, Assistant Minister, you must be joking. Handling disputes involving one’s lover’s ex-wife… surely, you’re the expert.”

The Assistant Minister of the Imperial Clan, who had recently sworn brotherhood with a wild general, fell silent.

Can’t you keep quiet for once?

The Vice Minister of Rites continued, “Besides, Assistant Minister, jokes aside, who would be foolish enough to fall for this obvious—”

The word “trap” was on the tip of his tongue when a tall, imposing figure stepped forward.

“Your Highness, Princess Fangling!” It was Vice Minister Liu, frowning slightly as he stepped in front of the woman, shielding her from Princess Fangling’s sharp gaze. “She is but a humble peasant woman, incapable of withstanding the princess’s majesty. I humbly ask Your Highness to show more patience and not be overly harsh.”

The Vice Minister of Rites was stunned.

The Assistant Minister of the Imperial Clan was stunned.

The emperor, the other officials, and even the crown prince were all stunned.

And…

【Someone actually fell for that?!】

Xu Yanmiao was utterly shocked.

He was awestruck.

In his heart, he exclaimed loudly, 【Wow! Protecting the delicate and pitiful, huh?】

The emperor and his ministers had long been curious about one thing:

How was Xu Yanmiao capable of spewing blatant nonsense with such a straight face?

As for Vice Minister Liu, he was startled and quickly tried to distance himself. “She’s just an ordinary peasant woman. I’m merely showing compassion for the weak.”

Princess Fangling glanced at him, puzzled. “What does that have to do with me?”

Vice Minister Liu forced an awkward smile. “I was afraid Your Highness might misunderstand.”

—Actually, he was afraid his colleagues might misunderstand.

Turning slightly, he cast another glance at the woman. She wasn’t some stunning beauty, nor did she possess any charm. She was just an ordinary farmwoman, the type often seen bent over planting seedlings in the fields.

Vice Minister Liu reiterated firmly, “I truly am just showing compassion for the weak!”

Please don’t associate me with this aging farmwoman!

Another glance sideways, and he noticed Xu Yanmiao’s eyes sparkling even brighter. His eyelid twitched.

【This really feels like “the guilty party giving himself away,” doesn’t it?】

Vice Minister Liu took a deep breath.

Calm down. Don’t let that kid Xu Yanmiao get to you!

He repeated to himself three times: That kid doesn’t understand anything; he’s just here to watch the drama! Only then did he manage to suppress the frustration building in his chest.

Behind him, the woman’s timid voice suddenly spoke up: “Thank you, kind official. I… I…”

Vice Minister Liu snapped back to attention, patiently soothing her, “Take your time. Don’t rush. If you truly have been wronged, His Majesty will certainly see justice done for you.”

At that moment, Vice Minister Liu seemed to radiate brilliance.

With a faint, gentle smile, he exuded elegance and grace, like a noble orchid or a jade tree in the wind.

Outside the court, the gathered commoners were full of praise—

“This official isn’t bad!”

“He’s a good official!”

Vice Minister Liu’s smile deepened.

After all, he was the Vice Minister of Rites. And more precisely—Miss Tea—was the Left Vice Minister, while he was the Right Vice Minister. With the Minister of Rites already advanced in age and likely to retire within the next couple of years, the prospect of promotion was within reach.

They could both compete for the position of Minister! Originally, he and He Bi were evenly matched, no clear winner! But now this person has cozied up to the Grand General, bah! How shameless!

Tea Minister! You’ve forced me into this!

Since you’ve played the first card, don’t blame me for playing the fifteenth, fighting for a good reputation and stepping on you to climb higher!

Aren’t the commoners lamenting the absence of Qing Tian?

Wait for it! Liu Qing Tian is here!

【Ah, so that’s why he’s not giving the old emperor any face! Turns out he has a history!】

What?

The old emperor’s frustration quickly faded into curiosity.

Liu Minister has a past? How did I forget about that?

If it was some official giving direct advice, he wouldn’t have forgotten them!

【And there’s more than one case of it!】

The crown prince glanced at Liu Minister, noticing that his expression was equally confused.

At that moment, the curiosity among the onlookers peaked—what was this past? Even the person with the past had forgotten about it!

Many officials in the room were eagerly waiting, ready for Xu Yanmiao to reveal the juicy details!

Xu Yanmiao, with his efficient slicing of the metaphorical melon, clicked his tongue in admiration.

【He helped the Prince Consort during the Princess Wanshou incident!】

【When Princess Xiangyang divorced, he submitted an official letter in defiance of reason!】

“Ha—”

Could it be?!

The crown prince sat up straight, leaning forward, his eyes flashing with the shock of discovery.

No way! Could it be exactly what he was thinking?!

Some officials, aided by Xu Yanmiao, were recalling a man who seemed to be everywhere! A master at “participation”!

【He was the one who met with the virtuous woman during Ji Sui’s correspondence!】

【And—】

【When the Crown Prince of Jibei showed off his belt, he had the honor of personally touching it!】

The officials in the room: “!!!”

They pinched themselves hard, some even twisting their arms 360 degrees in an attempt to suppress their laughter.

They couldn’t laugh!

They absolutely couldn’t laugh!

Otherwise, they wouldn’t be able to explain the sudden outburst of laughter to Xiao Baize, and the emperor might peel their skin off!

Inside the hall.

The old emperor couldn’t laugh.

No, what’s wrong with this person? Is he deliberately opposing me?

＊

“I don’t know where this is, or about Liaodong, I don’t know anything. Thirty years ago, when my husband became the Prince Consort, I was afraid he might silence me, so I took my child and headed north. After seeing the sea and crossing the island, I felt it was far enough and settled in a village here.”

— Thirty years ago, the emperor had not yet issued the census orders, and the population across the regions was still disorganized. It wasn’t difficult to leave one’s hometown and move elsewhere—if you could walk and had money to rent or buy a house, it was fine.

The woman gathered the courage to finish explaining, seemingly very dependent on Vice Minister Liu: “Sir, that’s how it was… Sir?”

No response came.

The woman hesitated and looked up.

“Don’t call me that…”

I might not be a big official for long.

Vice Minister Liu wanted to cry but had no tears.

I don’t have any background at home, I can only fight for my future! Isn’t it just trying to latch onto the reputation of Qing Tian, use it to become a minister, and yet you’re going to nitpick like this!