CFSMS -Chapter 257 My Name Is Tian Xiaohua

“Darling, can you tell me who that woman was that you were chatting so enthusiastically with on One Realm Connect last night?”

“Oh, just a friend.”

“What kind of friend?”

“A bed friend.”

“You scumbag! I’m going to kill you!”

The green-hatted girl pulled out a giant hammer and immediately began chasing him down.

There was even bonus entertainment while running the stall. Lu Wu practically wanted to pull out a stool and a bag of sunflower seeds to enjoy the drama, but the diners refused to give her any time to rest.

Looking at Boss Lu’s eager expression, the customers felt itchy all over.

Food or social death?

That was an incredibly difficult choice.

As the number of “victims” continued to grow, many diners began doing their best to reduce their presence.

“Boss Lu, see you tomorrow!”

The customer at the front grabbed his food, tossed out the farewell, and fled before anyone else had a chance to act.

The speed at which he escaped kicked up a trail of dust.

Clearly, this was someone who had made plenty of enemies in his daily life.

“Next!”

Lu Wu called out and immediately heard a response.

“Silkworm pupae, wood borers, and grasshoppers. I’ll take those three.”

The order itself was perfectly normal, but Lu Wu didn’t move for quite some time. She stared carefully at the customer across from her, deeply puzzled.

He hadn’t opened his mouth just now, had he?

Nor was it voice transmission.

Could it be ventriloquism?

Or had their minds somehow become linked?

As Lu Wu’s gaze shifted around, the customer seemed to realize what she was thinking.

“Boss Lu, that wasn’t me ordering.”

“Boss Lu, it was me.”

The voice appeared again, this time from her left.

A hand suddenly emerged and tugged at her sleeve. The pale fingers looked like those of a corpse that had never seen sunlight. The sudden sight nearly stopped Lu Wu’s heart.

“…”

Good grief. The guy was invisible.

“Ahem. I’ve got a few too many enemies.”

In order to get Boss Lu’s food sooner, he had pulled plenty of dirty tricks in the past.

Now, all those customers he had schemed against were standing around with sinister smiles, waiting for a chance to strike.

Fortunately, he knew how to use his brain.

If he cast an invisibility spell, nobody could see where he was.

“Hehehe!”

The man’s smug chuckling echoed nearby.

Lu Wu handed over the food. The floating hand took it, and moments later, the sound of enthusiastic chewing rang out again.

After listening for a bit, Lu Wu silently observed a second of mourning for him in advance.

“Shen Qi, where did you hide the undergarment you stole from that disciple of the Acacia Sect last time?”

A man in the crowd suddenly shouted the question.

“I sewed it into my inner lining.”

The invisible Shen Qi answered smoothly.

Then he exploded.

“Holy crap, that works too?!”

The panic in Shen Qi’s voice was unmistakable.

Of course it worked.

He was still standing there, and he hadn’t blocked his ears. As long as he could hear the question, the effect would activate.

Though this Shen Qi fellow certainly had some unusual tastes.

“No way. Could the pervert who got hunted across thousands of miles by the Acacia Sect be this Shen Qi?”

Someone in the crowd exclaimed.

About half a month ago, the Acacia Sect had suddenly issued a bounty. A pervert had supposedly infiltrated the sect, peeked at female disciples bathing, and stolen several personal items.

“You’re talking nonsense! Someone else was the bathhouse peeper. I only stole the undergarment. It had mandarin ducks on it!”

Shen Qi’s voice was full of pride.

Clearly, he saw no shame in it whatsoever.

“Damn it, I’m finished.”

Only after answering did regret become obvious in his tone.

“Pervert! Die!”

As a major sect, the Acacia Sect had disciples all over the place, and many of them were regular customers of Lu Wu.

The moment Shen Qi confessed, a female disciple of the Acacia Sect unleashed a spell toward Lu Wu’s side.

Flames streaked past the stall and struck a precise location.

“Ow! Ow! Ow!”

“Miss, you’re serious?! It’s just one undergarment! I’ll give it back, alright? Is this really necessary?”

Shen Qi was hopping around in pain, though his voice sounded strangely distant.

“Time to run!”

He had finally realized he couldn’t stay here any longer today.

“Oh no, he’s getting away!”

His aura was already disappearing.

The female disciple hesitated.

Catching the thief would earn her a considerable merit reward, but she still hadn’t gotten any food yet.

“Forget it. I’ll let you off this time.”

In the end, she chose to stay.

After Shen Qi’s example, however, the remaining diners began coming up with all sorts of creative solutions.

“Behold my Heavenly Net!”

A black sphere exploded in the sky.

Thick smoke instantly covered the area in front of the Divine Physician Hall before a gust of wind quickly dispersed it.

But when visibility returned, Lu Wu turned her head in confusion.

Where had everyone gone?

Just moments ago, customers had been packed shoulder-to-shoulder in line.

Now the space in front of the stall was completely empty.

“Boss Lu, it’s my turn to order.”

The voice that spoke was extremely hoarse, clearly disguised.

The people were still there.

Every single one of them had turned invisible.

To buy some food, they were really going all out.

Voices drifted unpredictably through the air, making it impossible to pinpoint anyone’s location.

Since all her customers were a little strange, Lu Wu decided to be tolerant.

The food she placed on the counter vanished almost immediately after being set down.

“Heh, I refuse to believe I’ll still get caught like this.”

The crisp crack of fried insect shells being bitten apart echoed clearly.

“Brother, what’s your name?”

“My name’s Tian Xiaohua.”

?

Why had he told the truth?

He’d been hit by the effect!

“No, no, no! You heard wrong! My name is Tian Qingfeng, not Tian Xiaohua!”

“Are you sure your name isn’t Tian Xiaohua?” another diner asked mischievously.

“No. My name really is Tian Xiaohua.”

“Damn it all! I was making that up! Don’t believe me!”

Tian Xiaohua completely broke down.

Ever since leaving his village, he had changed his name to Tian Qingfeng.

How could a grown man possibly keep using a name as feminine and rustic as Tian Xiaohua?

But now everyone knew his real name.

“My mom’s calling me home for dinner. I’m leaving.”

Tian Xiaohua chose to flee the scene.

The facts proved that even disguising one’s voice was useless.

Once you ate the food, every question would be answered honestly.

After watching these two geniuses demonstrate exactly what not to do, silence descended over the crowd.

Those who had already eaten—or who simply had nothing to hide—were having a great time watching from the sidelines.

While Lu Wu wondered what other bizarre tricks her customers might come up with, a slip of paper landed on her stall.

Several hastily scribbled words were written on it.

After examining it carefully, Lu Wu realized the customer was placing an order.

“You want these three? Got it. Coming right up.”

This customer simply refused to speak at all, and Lu Wu had no idea where he was hiding.

The moment she set down the packaged food, a spell shot over from the distance, scooped it up, and whisked it away.

“Brothers, I’ll be taking my leave first.”

Apparently, this fellow had gotten smarter.

The instant he obtained his food, he ran, giving nobody a chance to question him.

His method inspired many others.

Soon, slips of paper fell like snowflakes, piling up all over Lu Wu’s stall.

The insects continued to sell, their numbers steadily decreasing, but the customers themselves remained nowhere to be seen.

Looking at this absurd style of doing business, Lu Wu could already imagine how entertaining the next few days of stall-running would be.

Sneaking around like thieves, buying food, and bolting the moment they got it…