SBCEJM -Chapter 82 His Hidden Weapon in His Arms!

Zhao Xiaobao tightly covered his chest with both hands, looking like he would rather die than let anyone take what was inside.

“I-it’s nothing…”

His eyes darted around wildly, refusing to meet Feng Zexuan’s gaze.

Feng Zexuan narrowed her eyes slightly.

This kid was clearly hiding something big.

【System, what exactly is he carrying?】

【Ding! Host, the composition of this object is special and highly valuable for research!】

The system deliberately dragged it out, sounding excited like it had discovered a new world.

【Cut the nonsense. Speak.】

【Analysis complete: the item is a mammal of the class Mammalia, order Carnivora, family Felidae. Commonly known as… a kitten!】

Feng Zexuan’s cold expression almost cracked.

【A kitten? Are you sure? Who the hell brings a cat onto a battlefield?】

“Zhao Xiaobao.”

Her tone turned sharp and firm.

“Take it out.”

“Marshal, I…”

“Military order.”

Just two words were enough to hit his weak point.

Zhao Xiaobao looked like he was about to cry. With extreme reluctance, trembling all over, he slowly loosened his grip on his chest.

A fluffy white little head peeked out from inside his loose robe.

It was only the size of a palm, snow-white all over except for a faint ash-gray tint on the tips of its ears.

Its clear blue eyes blinked as it curiously examined the group of blood-soaked, battle-hardened soldiers.

“Meow~”

A soft, milky cry drifted out like an invisible feather brushing across everyone’s hardened hearts.

“Holy crap…”

Captain Li Hu instinctively rubbed his eyes, seriously suspecting he had killed himself into hallucinating.

But then something even stranger happened.

The six tied-up Hunnu assassins on the ground all stared straight at it.

They had forgotten their wounds, forgotten the blades at their necks—just fixated blankly on the kitten.

From their throats came strange “gurgling” sounds, and the ferocity in their eyes melted away instantly, replaced by obsession and docility.

Feng Zexuan felt it was absurd beyond belief.

【Something’s wrong.】

“Marshal!”

Deputy Commander Chen Jin also noticed the anomaly, pointing at the six dazed assassins with a grave expression.

“They… they look like they’ve been bewitched!”

【System, is this poison? Or an illusion?】

【Ding! Host report: physiological indicators are normal, but dopamine levels in the brain are comparable to those of drug addicts! They are in an extreme state of pleasure and obsession!】

“Meow~”

The kitten in Zhao Xiaobao’s arms meowed again.

The six assassins collectively let out satisfied sighs, looking almost heavenly.

【…Don’t tell me the source of this pleasure is that cat?】

Feng Zexuan’s worldview took a heavy hit.

【Congratulations, Host! You’ve hit the key point! It is the source of the hallucination! A failed experimental “mental-type war cat” from the Hunnu royal court—its genes mutated!】

【A failed product?】

【Yes! Its meow emits a kind of pheromone-like signal targeting adult males of Hunnu bloodline. It breaks their will to fight and triggers intense protective instincts!】

【In short: “Hunnu-exclusive bloodline suppression—cute kill mode.” Passive skill. Permanent effect. No resistance possible!】

Feng Zexuan went completely numb.

So while I’m fighting a cold-weapon war here, you’re casually deploying a targeted bio-weapon?

【Why is it a failed product?】

【Because it only works on their own people. It’s useless against Great Xia soldiers! The ultimate traitor weapon!】

【The Hunnu got furious and dumped it as scrap… then Zhao Xiaobao’s mother picked it up and treated it like a protective charm, giving it to her son.】

Feng Zexuan almost laughed out loud.

That mother-son duo—one actually dared to give it, the other actually dared to bring it. Absolute chaos geniuses.

“Marshal…”

Seeing everyone’s strange expressions, Zhao Xiaobao asked cautiously:

“Did I… break military law? I-I’ll take it away right now…”

“What’s its name?”

“Xiao Bai…”

He gently stroked the kitten’s fur, his eyes full of reluctance.

“I named it.”

Looking at the boy and the cat, something soft inside Feng Zexuan’s heart was lightly touched.

【Forget it. Keep it. This isn’t a cat—it’s a mobile anti-Hunnu defense tower. Might actually be useful later.】

“Xiao Bai can stay.”

Her voice returned to calm.

“But it must obey military discipline. If it disrupts operations or training, it will be punished by military law.”

“Really?!”

Zhao Xiaobao’s eyes lit up instantly.

“Thank you, Marshal! I promise Xiao Bai won’t cause trouble!”

“Handle the real matter.”

Feng Zexuan glanced at the six utterly mesmerized assassins.

“Take them away. Interrogate them separately!”

“Yes!”

Chen Jin’s men dragged the assassins away. Even then, they kept turning their heads back unwillingly, staring at the kitten like fathers being separated from their beloved child.

Soon the courtyard emptied, leaving only Feng Zexuan and Zhao Xiaobao.

“You stumbled into merit tonight. Your merits and faults cancel out.”

She looked at him.

“But be careful. On the battlefield, not every enemy will be defeated by cuteness.”

“Yes! I understand! I’ll train harder so next time I can protect the Marshal without tricks!”

Zhao Xiaobao bowed deeply and ran off holding his “weapon of mass destruction,” disappearing in a flash.

His back carried a kind of relieved joy.

Feng Zexuan shook her head helplessly.

What even was this situation.

She turned back toward her room. The night wind brushed past, bringing a chill and dispersing the lingering absurdity in her mind.

With a thought, her vision shifted.

The smell of home-cooked food hit her instantly.

Feng Zekai was sitting at the dining table, the dishes in front of him still steaming, clearly just reheated in the microwave.

“Why are you back so late? Trouble at the battlefield?”

There was a hint of concern between his brows.

Feng Zexuan picked up her chopsticks, grabbed a large piece of braised pork, and stuffed it into her mouth, speaking vaguely:

“Don’t even ask, brother. Tonight’s story is way more ridiculous than the novels you read…”

While eating, she recounted everything that had just happened.

After listening, Feng Zekai first frowned slightly, then relaxed. A sharp glint flashed in his eyes.

“This seems absurd, but it’s actually a brilliant move. That cat can’t conquer cities, but it can paralyze the enemy’s command structure without bloodshed.”

“If used for infiltrating the royal court, or suppressing guards during assassination operations… it’s more effective than any divine weapon.”

【…Brother, your thinking is even more capitalist than mine.】

Feng Zexuan silently continued eating.

【I’m still thinking about how to pet the cat, and you’re already planning how to use it to conquer the world.】

Feng Zekai ignored her thoughts entirely, already deep in contemplation.

“Decapitation strikes, incitement, internal division… Zexuan, this cat is priceless.”

His voice was low, but carried a burning intensity unfamiliar to her.

【Great. My brother’s war DNA just activated.】

【I picked up a lucky mascot… he saw a whole conquest-of-the-world script.】

Looking at her brother’s strategist-like expression, Feng Zexuan suddenly felt:

This world might really become a lot more interesting—because of a single cat.