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Li Hui now works at the Provincial Education Bureau in the capital. Since the elderly couple of the Li family live in the city and her unreliable brother Li Wenchang can’t be counted on, she spends most of her time staying at the Li household to keep them company. Still, she hasn’t forgotten to help keep an eye on the Shen family’s house. She comes by on weekends to tidy up. So when Zuo Dan and her family returned to the Shen house, it looked just the same as when they left—not at all like a place that had been uninhabited for nearly a year. Everything felt warm and homely.
Grandma was delighted to see the house so well maintained. She had been worried they’d return to find it in disrepair, deserted and desolate. As an elderly woman, she feared nothing more than seeing a home where things remained the same but the people had changed. She held Li Hui’s hand and kept thanking her again and again.
Cradled in Li Hui’s arms, Shen Youyou mimicked his grandma and chimed in, “Hard work, hard work! Thank you, thank you!”
He didn’t really know what he was saying, but Li Hui was delighted nonetheless. “Youyou can talk now! When you left, you couldn’t even walk, and now not only can you walk, you’re talking, too. Children really change so quickly. Just one year and he’s grown so much.”
Zuo Dan brought in warm water to wipe Shen Youyou’s face and hands. She smiled and said, “He’s got lots of new skills now. His biggest skill is eating. As long as you give him food, he’ll never say no.”
“Eat! Sweet! Grandpa sweet!”
As soon as Shen Youyou heard about food, he perked right up. He squirmed around, looking for his little snacks. He remembered he hadn’t finished them yet—his mom had put them away.
When she heard what Shen Youyou said, Zuo Dan instinctively glanced at Li Hui before quickly going to get the snacks.
When Shen Youyou saw the small box filled with pastries, his eyes lit up. The moment Zuo Dan took one out and handed it to him, he grabbed it and took a big bite. Noticing his grandma curiously watching the pastry, he reached out to offer it to her. “Eat! Sweet!”
Li Hui laughed. “Grandma doesn’t want it. You eat it.”
Shen Youyou didn’t hold back then and stuffed it into his mouth with big bites.
Zuo Dan pointed at him and said, “See? This is how he is now. I’m worried he’s going to grow into a little chubby boy.”
“Chubby is good! No one in our family has ever been chubby before,” Grandma said, clearly hoping Shen Youyou would gain some weight.
Zuo Dan didn’t argue with her on this point. Times had changed, and so had perceptions. There was no point in debating. They would just be mindful and control his diet properly.
Li Hui, however, was curious. “Even Beijing has these kinds of things now?”
“Mhm, yes. There’s a lot more stuff in Beijing now. They just held a meeting recently—reform and opening up. In the future, foreign goods will come in, and our goods will go out. There’ll be more and more things available.”
Li Hui smiled and kissed Youyou. “That’s great. Kids like Youyou will get to see a lot of amazing new things in their lifetime.”
That evening, the family cooked dinner at home. Knowing they were coming back, Li Hui had already prepared the ingredients. It was the middle of winter, so there was no worry about anything spoiling.
After dinner, Shen Yiming automatically gave up his room so that Zuo Dan and Li Hui and daughter could sleep together. Shen Youyou followed his dad to the guest room next door. Although he was very unwilling, under his dad’s stern gaze, he had no choice but to comply. After begrudgingly listening to the bedtime story his dad read him, he curled up in his father’s arms and fell into a warm, cozy sleep.
Shen Yiming looked at his son with a loving smile at the corners of his eyes and brows.
In his heart, he supported Zuo Dan in telling everyone about Mr. Chen. Now that he was a father himself, he understood more deeply how meaningful it was to be a part of a child’s upbringing. Missing out on that process would be a lifelong regret for any father.
Mr. Chen had not raised Dandan, but that was due to circumstance. If he’d had the chance to raise his own child, he surely would have been a good father. One shouldn’t deny that just because he hadn’t raised her.
Thinking of how heartbroken he’d be if he couldn’t watch Youyou grow up, he knew the pain of such regret would last a lifetime.
In the room next door, Zuo Dan didn’t tell Li Hui about Chen Zhisen right away.
She had just returned and hadn’t sorted everything out in her mind. If she blurted out the truth too quickly, she didn’t know what consequences it might bring.
She leaned on Li Hui’s shoulder, talking about her university life. Every now and then, Li Hui smiled knowingly, full of pride. Her daughter was so outstanding, so strong and independent—far better than she had ever been.
She thought of herself as weak like a dodder vine, always needing to cling to others whenever something happened. All she could ever do was submit. But her daughter was different. Even after marriage, she could still stand side-by-side with her husband Shen Yiming, equally capable and accomplished.
That was already wonderful.
“Mom, with the reform and opening up, many overseas Chinese have started returning. If that person comes back…”
At that, Li Hui’s face froze. She frowned and said, “Dandan, don’t mention that person again. It’s been so many years—I’ve already let it go. Our family is doing well now. Whether he comes back or not makes no difference. All I care about now is seeing you and Xiaocong living well. You’re already married and have a child—I’m relieved. I’m just waiting for Xiaocong to marry and have children too, then I’ll have no regrets left. I never imagined I’d live this long. It was your father who gave me support and hope. Don’t bring up that man again. It would only make your father sad.”
Zuo Dan fell silent for a moment, then asked again, “But what if there was a misunderstanding back then? What if it was all due to circumstances?”
“…That’s the same. He left, and this is the result.” Li Hui sighed. Thinking about how the man mentioned by Zuo Dan might return, she realized that some things could no longer be avoided. She needed to make things clear to her daughter about what happened back then. “I waited for him in vain with no news. When I found out I was pregnant with you, I was both anxious and joyful. I thought that when he came back, we could reunite as a family. But in the end, the news I got was that he had gone abroad. I couldn’t believe it, so I asked your grandfather’s friend in Beijing to inquire, only to find out that his family had gone abroad long ago… Even though I knew there had to be a reason behind it, at that time I was in pain, and I was scared… If it weren’t for Dacheng, you and I probably wouldn’t be alive today.”
Even after so many years, the memory still filled her with fear.
“Dandan, people our age are no longer at the stage to talk about love and romance. My love for your father developed from kinship—it’s complicated. After more than twenty years of supporting each other through thick and thin, our feelings are no longer the same as they were back then. Even if he comes back, even if he has his reasons, the experiences of these twenty years can’t be undone. I don’t want my current life to change. It’s good the way it is.”
Zuo Dan hadn’t spoken the entire time. She closed her eyes, reflecting on Li Hui’s words.
More than twenty years… An unbridgeable gulf.
After Li Hui fell asleep, Zuo Dan was still thinking about it. She felt that the reason Li Hui could say that “even if he had his reasons, it’s still the same” was because she didn’t know Mr. Chen’s situation.
If she knew, even if she had no feelings left, she wouldn’t be unmoved.
The next day, Li Hui took a leave from work and brought them to the Li family home to meet her parents.
Li Hui’s parents had been thinking about them. Especially Grandfather Li, who often heard about the two children’s performance at school from his old friends and felt very proud and gratified. So he was even more eager to know about their development outside of school.
As soon as they arrived at the Li home, Grandfather Li happily pulled the two of them into the study to chat and ask about their studies.
Grandmother Li, meanwhile, hugged Youyou tightly and wouldn’t let go. In their eyes, a son or a daughter was the same—it was all the same bloodline. So Shen Youyou was the fourth generation of the Li family, their great-grandchild.
They hadn’t seen him in a year, and Shen Youyou had completely forgotten them. But in his mind, there was no concept of “strangers.” As long as his parents were comfortable handing him to someone, then that person must be trustworthy. Since they were trustworthy, he could happily and innocently play with them. Of course, he didn’t understand this logic—this was just his natural instinct.
So he snuggled obediently in Grandmother Li’s arms, occasionally flashing an adorable smile that melted her heart.
In the study, Grandfather Li tested their studies. After hearing the articles published by Shen Yiming and Zuo Dan, he was both satisfied and joyful. His face glowed with pride, exuding the look of a man confident in the next generation.
Just as the conversation ended, Grandmother Li had already finished preparing the meal. She even complained, “They finally came home and all you care about is their studies. Don’t you already know how well they’re doing in university? Even if you’re not tired, they must be.”
Grandfather Li laughed heartily, pretending not to hear. When he saw Shen Youyou running all over the floor, he walked over and asked, “Do you still recognize me?”
Shen Youyou tilted his head and looked at him for a while. He found it hard to decide. Grandpas have white hair, but this one had a lot of white hair.
“Grandpa!”
“Wrong! Great-grandpa, call me Great-grandpa.” Even though he got it wrong, Grandfather Li was thrilled. This child was clearly smart and curious.
“Say Great-grandpa, Great-grandpa,” Grandfather Li coached.
Though Youyou didn’t speak much yet, he could already pronounce words clearly. Upon hearing this, he crisply said, “Great-grandpa.”
Grandfather Li beamed as he hugged him. “What a bright child! If you all lived in the provincial capital, I’d personally teach him. He’s sure to grow into someone great.”
Grandmother Li replied, “Good thing you don’t! Otherwise, you’d turn him into a boring old scholar. It’s enough for us two old folks to be muddled. Let the kids walk their own paths. Dandan and Yiming are both top students at Peking, of course they can teach a child.”
Grandfather Li thought about how he had raised Li Wenchang into the person he was and suddenly felt a bit melancholic. He had indeed raised a bookworm who didn’t understand the world and was muddle-headed.
Better not to ruin the next generation.
Sensing Grandfather Li’s sudden mood change, Zuo Dan was a little puzzled. Then she noticed Grandmother Li also looked a bit gloomy, which confused her more. She turned to Li Hui, who whispered in her ear, “Guo Caiping is out. A few days ago, she came here with your uncle, but your grandparents drove her away.”
Hearing that, Zuo Dan’s heart gave a jolt—oh, she had almost forgotten about that person. Guo Caiping had been sentenced to two years, and indeed, it was about time for her release.
She smiled and said, “Grandpa, Grandma, let’s eat! I’ve been craving Grandma’s cooking.”
Prompted by her reminder, Grandmother Li suddenly remembered it was mealtime and hurried to bring the dishes to the table, calling everyone to come eat.
After the meal, Li Hui had to go to work. She still had business to take care of at the Education Bureau.
Shen Yiming stayed in the study chatting with Shen Youyou, while Zuo Dan helped Grandmother Li clean up the dishes in the kitchen.
Once they were done, Grandmother Li was about to go fetch Shen Youyou from the study when Zuo Dan stopped her. “Grandma, I have something to talk to you about.”
Seeing Zuo Dan’s serious expression, Grandmother Li asked, “What is it?”
Zuo Dan pulled her into a room and said directly, “Grandma, I saw Mr. Chen in Beijing City.”
Grandmother Li instantly stiffened. “You… you really met him?” Then she muttered, “Well, makes sense. You’re both in Beijing City. And you’re at Peking… That’s where he studied back then.”
She looked at Zuo Dan anxiously. “Dandan, I know he’s doing well now and could give you a better life. But we must have a conscience—we can’t forget where we came from.”
Zuo Dan held her hand and reassured her, “Grandma, how could you not trust me? No matter what, I wouldn’t abandon my Dad just because Mr. Chen is doing well. Actually, what I wanted to talk to you about is something else…”
She then told her everything she had learned about the past—how Chen Zhisen had risked bringing someone out, how an accident happened midway, and all the misunderstandings that followed.
Grandmother Li was visibly shocked—clearly, she hadn’t known there was so much behind what happened back then.
“Could… could it be fake? Your mother never received any letters back then. With the kind of personality she had, if she had received a letter, she would’ve never married someone else, even if it meant dying. You don’t know how desperate your mother was back then. To avoid inhumane treatment… she even tried to commit suicide with you… If it hadn’t been for your Dad pulling her out of the lake, you both would’ve died. If she had received a letter and knew your biological father’s hardships, how could she have borne to take you with her to die? Even if it meant enduring humiliation, she would’ve tried everything to protect you.” Grandmother Li was in tears as she recalled the events of the past.
If it weren’t for Zuo Dacheng, she would’ve lost her daughter. If he hadn’t married her daughter, given her situation at the time, her reputation would have been ruined and she would have been beaten to death by others.
Hearing all this, Zuo Dan imagined the kind of situation Li Hui was in at the time, and her heart sank. For women of that era, that truly was a disaster.
“Grandma, this matter isn’t fake. We heard it from one of Yiming’s friends. He didn’t even know about our connection to the Chen family. His grandfather was the one who wrote the letter back then, and he’s been burdened by it ever since. He’s still lying in a hospital bed today. Grandma, I know you all blame him, but he really tried his best…”
Grandmother Li covered her face with her hands and let out a long, choked sigh. “Such misfortune… truly misfortune… Why would Heaven arrange for all this? No wonder your grandfather and I thought his disability was caused by an accident in America. Who would’ve thought… Dandan, you’re right. He did his best. He suffered… but twenty years have passed. What can we do now?”
Zuo Dan said hesitantly, “Grandma, I don’t know what to do either. I don’t want our family to fall apart, but I also don’t want Mr. Chen to bear the blame and injustice all alone. He didn’t do anything wrong. He’s a respectable man. And now he’s even returned to support the country’s development. Someone like him shouldn’t be treated unfairly.”
“You want your mother to know?” Grandmother Li asked.
Zuo Dan nodded. “Not just my mother, but also my father. Even though my mom has come to terms with it now, I’m sure she still remembers what it felt like to be abandoned. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have been so hurt by just one sentence from Su Xue. I want her to know that she was never abandoned.”
Grandmother Li sighed heavily. “What you say makes sense… but what about Dacheng? I really don’t want your dad to suffer. He’s a good man.”
“…That depends mainly on my mom’s attitude,” Zuo Dan replied.
Grandmother Li couldn’t stop wiping her tears. “Fate is so cruel. I’ll find a chance to talk to your mom about it. She’s always been a reasonable person. Dandan, do you want to acknowledge him?”
Zuo Dan nodded. “I want him to know he has a daughter.”
Whether or not she acknowledged him as her father didn’t matter much to her personally—after all, she had no emotional bond with Chen Zhisen. But she didn’t want Chen Zhisen to grow old alone, unloved and without children. That was the only comfort she could give him.
Outside the door, there was a loud thud, as if something heavy had fallen.
Zuo Dan and Grandmother Li were startled and quickly ran out of the room—only to find Li Hui lying unconscious just outside the door. They were shocked.
“Mom!”
“Xiaohui!”
Zuo Dan quickly helped Li Hui up, but she was already unconscious.
Shen Yiming and Grandfather Li, hearing the commotion, rushed out from the study. Seeing the situation, Shen Yiming quickly picked Li Hui up and laid her on the bed, then pressed her tiger’s mouth (hand acupuncture point) and her philtrum. Zuo Dan ran downstairs to call the hospital.
Li Hui’s face was pale, and she showed no response at all. The two elders of the Li family were terrified.
“What on earth is going on?” Grandfather Li asked anxiously.
Grandmother Li, crying, said, “This… this is all fate’s cruelty…”
Soon, the ambulance arrived and took Li Hui to the hospital. Shen Yiming and Zuo Dan went along to take care of her, while Grandfather Li and Grandmother Li stayed home to look after the children.
“What exactly happened to Xiaohui?” Grandfather Li asked.
Grandmother Li let out a long sigh. “Back then… we all wrongly blamed Zhisen…”
After hearing her explanation, Grandfather Li was speechless for a long time. He closed his eyes, and tears streamed down his face. What had he done wrong for the Li family to suffer so much? Why did his daughter have to go through so many hardships?
In the end, his complaints could only turn into a lifetime of helplessness. “Even if we had known his reasons back then, it wouldn’t have changed the tragedy. So many years have passed—everything has changed. There’s no going back. I just hope the whole family can still live in peace… with no more accidents.”
At the hospital, Li Hui had already woken up. She lay in bed with an IV drip, not saying a word.
“Mom, say something.” Zuo Dan sat by the bed.
Li Hui moved her lips but said nothing. So many things she had tried to forget all came flooding back in an instant, only to shatter mercilessly.
It all felt like a previous life.
The fragments flashed before her eyes like a carousel, as if she had been dreaming all these years. And in the end, all that was left was more than twenty years of life.
She closed her eyes. “I want to rest for a while. I’m fine, Dandan. I’ve gone through so much—I’m not that fragile person anymore.”
Zuo Dan had no choice. She never expected that Li Hui, after going to work, would return and overhear their conversation. But perhaps this was for the best. Neither she nor Grandma had the heart to speak about it. Now they didn’t need to.
Li Hui remained in the hospital until just before the Lunar New Year. Zuo Dacheng also came from Zuo Village to the provincial city.
Zuo Dan and the others hadn’t told Zuo Dacheng about Li Hui’s hospitalization, because at that time, what Li Hui needed most was peace of mind.
But once he arrived in the city, he found out about it right away. Worried sick, he rushed to the hospital, extremely anxious.
“How could no one tell me about such a big thing? She’s been hospitalized for days, and no one informed me. I didn’t even get to visit her!”
Zuo Dacheng’s eyes were red with worry.
Li Hui leaned against the hospital bed and smiled at him. “I’m fine. I’m just not feeling too well mentally. It’s the end of the year—you’re busy. Why come all the way here?”
“No matter how busy I am, I need to see you. Even if I quit everything, I can’t just ignore you,” Zuo Dacheng said anxiously.
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