HLM – Chapter 68 Handsome Guys and Beautiful Girls, Come Play!

But when Wang Bo finally saw the slogan on the promotional sign, he was dumbfounded—completely and utterly dumbfounded. The sign read in massive letters:

“Handsome guys and beautiful girls, come play! I’m waiting to hook up with you in Sunset Town…”

Bowen proudly presented his masterpiece, beaming as he explained:

“Look, the theme is crystal clear—‘Handsome guys and beautiful girls, come play!’ The imagery is evocative—the background I chose is so atmospheric, right? It shows respect to other towns—I didn’t even mention them. And it highlights our own town—I capitalized and bolded ‘Sunset Town’, see it? The message has a hint of allure—‘waiting to hook up’; but it’s not vulgar—I didn’t say what we’re hooking up for. We could just grab a drink and talk about life. So, what do you think of my promotional slogan?”

He went on and on, full of self-satisfaction. The way he gazed at the sign—eyes full of fondness—was reminiscent of Steve Jobs admiring his beloved product at an Apple keynote.

Wang Bo exchanged a glance with Charlie. The latter said hesitantly, “In your country, wouldn’t someone carrying a sign like this on the street be… arrested?”

“That would be North Korea,” Wang Bo replied. “We’re not that conservative. At worst, people would just look down on us. What about in New Zealand?”

“It’d go viral,” Charlie replied. “They’d post us online, and then everyone could have a good Christmas laugh.”

Bowen looked at their strange expressions and asked in confusion, “You guys don’t think my idea is brilliant? I was so blown away by my own creativity. I bet even God Himself couldn’t come up with anything better!”

Wang Bo was speechless. He shouldn’t have expected anything more from an American. No wonder the Supreme Marshal of the Universe, Kim Jong-un, said American brains are full of the stuff he flushes down the toilet. Wang Bo used to think that was an insult to Americans—now he thought it was an insult to “the stuff.”

So he couldn’t blame Bowen. This one’s on him.

Realizing the situation, Bowen whispered to Wang Bo, “So… there’s no hope for my 64G iPhone, huh?”

“Oh, there’s hope,” Wang Bo said. “A big one. I’ll head over to the fruit store later and get you a 1000g apple—two whole pounds. A 64g one is too tiny, barely a tenth of a pound, not nearly as tasty.”

The parrot General flapped its wings and shrieked mockingly, “Ah, ah, no cure for idiots!”

The Christmas parade and festival had officially begun. Many people were carrying signs or wearing T-shirts printed with promotional slogans for local businesses or towns. Wang Bo could only stand on the street corner feeling disappointed.

Charlie lit a cigarette, blew out a smoke ring, and said, “Don’t worry. There’ll be more chances to promote later.”

Wang Bo looked at him. Charlie smiled and said, “Feeling better now?”

“No,” Wang Bo replied. “I just wanted to remind you—smoking is arson, and arson is a crime!”

Charlie raised his middle finger at him.

Fortunately, the weather today was a blessing. It wasn’t as hot as yesterday. The sky was overcast, and since the small town wasn’t far from the coast, a sea breeze blew in and cooled things down considerably.

Bowen loved windy days—especially strong winds—because he could always spot pretty girls whose skirts got blown up on the street.

Noticing Bowen’s eyes gleaming like a hungry wolf, Wang Bo went to buy him a pair of sunglasses and handed them over, “Here, buddy. Put these on.”

Bowen was touched. “Thanks for caring, boss. But the sun’s not that bright—I don’t really need shades.”

“No, you do,” Wang Bo said coldly. “To hide your creepy gaze. Seriously, man. It’s too sleazy.”

Bowen returned the middle finger salute, but still obediently put the sunglasses on.

It was a good time. Soon, Wang Bo spotted Eva walking in the parade with her little sister. He went over to greet her. “Hey, Eva! Merry Christmas. Great to see you.”

Eva led the little girl out of the crowd, smiling warmly. “Thank you! Merry Christmas to you too, Wang. It’s nice running into you.”

Wang Bo noticed the little girl looking up at him with her chubby, expectant face. Clearly, she was hoping for a Christmas gift. Awkwardly, he realized he hadn’t prepared one—he hadn’t expected to run into Eva. But then he remembered the nicely wrapped box the hotel owner gave him last night, so he pulled it out and gave it to the girl.

“Merry Christmas, Dale!”

The little girl’s smile bloomed like a sunflower. Taking the gift, she said happily, “Merry Christmas, big brother! Dale really likes you!”

With nothing else to do, Wang Bo teased her. “You like me? Then did you prepare a gift for me? If not, can you give me the gift Santa gave you last night instead?”

The little girl giggled and said, “Sure! But Santa didn’t give me anything. Only my sister gave me a present. Santa’s just in stories—I’ve never seen him. I think he’s not real.”

Eva gently helped smooth the girl’s pigtails, her face full of affection.

Wang Bo was surprised. “Dale, you’re so mature already? How do you know Santa Claus isn’t real? He only shows up after you fall asleep—that’s why you never see him!”

The little girl shook her head. “I’m almost in primary school. I know everything. Sure, I might sleep at night, but I don’t sleep during the day. And the stories say it always snows on Christmas—but it never has! So the stories are fake, right?”

Seeing her little “you can’t fool me just because I’m small” face, Wang Bo and the people around them burst into laughter.

He couldn’t help kissing her forehead and said, “I’ll take you to my hometown for Christmas someday, silly girl. It really does snow there!”

The little girl made a funny face, wiped off the kiss from her forehead, and hopped away to rejoin the parade. Eva shrugged and gave him an apologetic look before hurrying after her.

Watching her back, Wang Bo chuckled. “She’s going to make a great wife and mom someday.”

Charlie frowned. “You want to pursue Eva? Didn’t I tell you to stay away from her?”

“Why?” Wang Bo asked.

Charlie said, “Because… because… your signs don’t match! Your horoscopes don’t match! Your zodiac animals don’t match! Remember last time how you almost got sued by that thug? It was because you had dinner with her. I swear, if you chase her, you’ll regret it!”

Wang Bo nodded. “Thanks.”

Charlie breathed a sigh of relief. “So you believe me now?”

Wang Bo rolled his eyes. “Believe what? I was just thanking you for reminding me of something. Let’s go find a Chinese shop. I need to invite Lord Guan back home—I forgot to pray to him before going abroad. No wonder I’ve been hit with so much bad luck lately.”

Without the promo sign, staying out here was a waste of time. Might as well go back to the castle and relax.

He wandered around the town but couldn’t find a statue of Lord Guan. He did, however, manage to find a portrait of him—for now, it would have to do.