EMHTC -Chapter 128 Brother, You’re Wrong!

To ensure a relatively fair imperial examination and to prevent candidates from deliberately approaching examiners, the identities of the examiners were not disclosed before the exam. Especially the chief examiner—except for court officials, no one knew who it was.

Of course, if someone randomly visited an official after arriving in the capital and that official happened to be an examiner, as long as there was no evidence of cheating, it would be considered a coincidence and not an issue.

Therefore, many candidates who came to the capital were eager to bring their essays and visit officials everywhere, hoping to gamble on their luck and gain the favor of an examiner.

Gao He had also done the same before, even spending all the silver he had obtained from selling out his ancestors to bribe the gatekeepers of various officials, begging them to place his visiting card and essay in front of the master of the house.

And now, you’re telling me that I actually knew an examiner all along?!

Gao He’s eyes instantly filled with tears.

My money!!!

After verifying his identity, Xu Yanmiao smiled and said, “Go on in. Don’t forget to check the seating chart on the main gate and find your assigned seat.”

Gao He cupped his hands in gratitude. “Many thanks, sir.”

As he walked through the gates of the examination hall, he kept turning back, shaking his head repeatedly.

“So young… and already an examiner…”

People really can’t be compared to each other.

Xu Yanmiao diligently called out names, carefully verifying each candidate. After checking one, he would patiently remind them to look at the seating chart.

Dozens of armed guards stood on either side of him, their hawk-like eyes scanning the examinees’ attire. If they noticed anything suspicious, they would immediately pounce and conduct a thorough search.

Slowly, dawn approached.

“There shouldn’t be anyone else coming.”

It was time to lock the examination hall.

Xu Yanmiao stood up, picked up the small oil lamp in his hand, and was about to blow out its flickering flame.

“Wait! Wait!”

An urgent voice called out.

Xu Yanmiao looked over and saw a yellow-faced man wearing a square scarf rushing over, his face flushed red from exertion. “Sir, I… I am also a candidate here for the exam!”

The torches on the examination hall’s walls illuminated the wind and salt stains on the man’s face—it was clear he had just finished a long journey.

Xu Yanmiao frowned slightly. “But… the seating chart has already been finalized. Your name isn’t on it, which means there is no assigned seat for you.”

—Candidates needed to register in advance at the Ministry of Rites. After the registration deadline, the ministry arranged the seating chart and sent it to the examination hall. If a name wasn’t on the list, it meant the candidate had not registered and thus had no seat.

— Previously, many candidates caught cheating had been expelled from the examination hall. However, their assigned seats in the exam hall remained, as their disqualification did not affect the seating arrangement.

The yellow-faced man’s eyes were bloodshot with anxiety as he pleaded desperately, “I arrived late because I was ambushed by bandits on the way! They took all my travel money and even dragged me up the mountain as a laborer. Later, they robbed some wealthy households, but when they couldn’t agree on how to split the loot, they started fighting among themselves. Several of them died, which finally gave me the chance to escape. Sir, please, I beg you, let me in! I’ve taken the exam five times before finally passing as a juren and qualifying for the spring imperial examination. I beg you!”

Xu Yanmiao checked the system.

【It’s true…】

【This man really is unlucky.】

The yellow-faced man couldn’t hear Xu Yanmiao’s thoughts and continued pleading. “I was delayed and missed the deadline to register at the Ministry of Rites—that is entirely my fault. I have no excuse. Now, I can only shamelessly beg for your mercy. I feel utterly ashamed.”

“But this exam means everything to me! I come from a poor mountain village. If I don’t take the hui shi this time, I will have to return home. My father is a gambler—he plans to sell my mother and sister. The only reason he hasn’t done it yet is because I convinced him that if he supported me in becoming an official, he’d have a better life. But lately, he’s grown impatient. If he finds out that I lost all my money and couldn’t even enter the examination hall… Sir, I beg you! I’ll kneel right here! Please, just give me a chance! I promise to cherish this opportunity and do my best to write a great policy essay to repay your kindness!”

By the end of his plea, his voice was choked with sobs.

Xu Yanmiao lowered his gaze and noticed a long red mark on the man’s palm—right where he had been gripping the reins. It looked like a thin, wriggling red worm. Some fibers from the rope were still embedded in the cut, evidence of his desperate journey.

Seeing his wretched state, Xu Yanmiao felt a pang of sympathy. He glanced at the time—there was still about one cup of tea’s time left before the examination hall would be locked.

“Go check the seating chart. If there’s still an empty spot, I’ll add you in.”

“Thank you, sir! Thank you so much!”

The yellow-faced man, like a starving person who had just seen food, rushed to the gate and clung to the seating chart, scanning it carefully. Finally, he found an empty spot—it wasn’t in a great location, right next to the latrines, but he didn’t care. He hurried back to inform Xu Yanmiao.

With the remaining time, Xu Yanmiao quickly added his name to the registry and conducted a last-minute inspection to ensure the man wasn’t carrying any hidden materials. Only then did he allow him inside.

“Do your best on the exam.”

Tears welled up in the man’s fierce-looking eyes. “Thank you, sir!” He bowed deeply before dashing into the examination hall.

Xu Yanmiao then made his way up to the Zhi Gong Tower.

The Minister of War smiled. “I saw a candidate enter just now. Which juren was so lazy that he arrived just before the gates were locked?”

Xu Yanmiao glanced around at the elegantly furnished Zhi Gong Tower, pulled out a chair, and sat down. He then recounted the yellow-faced man’s story to the Minister of War.

The Minister sighed in amazement. “He was lucky to run into you, Xu Lang. You have a kind heart. If it were me, I might not have let him in.”

Xu Yanmiao responded casually, “He’s taken the exam five times—it hasn’t been easy for him. If I can help, I will.”

Then, he opened a window and looked down at the rows of examination rooms.

The first test papers were being distributed by the armed guards. Some candidates immediately unrolled their paper and began writing, while others clutched their brushes, deep in thought.

From the tower above, the overseeing examiners—Xu Yanmiao included—had a clear view of everything happening below.

“So it’s true. From the platform, you really can see everything clearly,” Xu Yanmiao muttered to himself.

The Minister of War looked at him in confusion. “What are you talking about? What platform?”

Xu Yanmiao waved his hand dismissively. “Nothing, just talking to myself.” He continued curiously watching below.

But this time, he stayed silent.

【I’m just thinking to myself—no way anyone can hear me, right?】

“It’s here!!!”

A little farther from the examination hall, a group of officials had sneakily taken over someone’s house. With enough silver, the owner happily moved to an inn for the time being.

The house had hibiscus flowers growing at the gate, forming a dense hedge that conveniently blocked outside views.

“All thanks to Little Baize! Before the gates were locked, who could’ve known what was happening inside the exam hall?”

“Exactly, exactly!”

“My cousin is in there—I’m so worried.”

“Tch, don’t worry. My eldest grandson is also inside. They’re all grown men. They can take care of themselves.”

【HAHAHAHAHAHA! Who is this?! It’s only been half an hour since the exam started, and he’s already run to the latrine three times! HAHAHA!】

【The poor guy sitting next to the latrines is suffering. He’s about to pass out from the smell.】

【Who eats spicy hotpot the night before the hui shi? Of course, you’re going to have diarrhea!】

【Oh-ho! His grandfather is a Deputy Minister at the Guanglu Temple? That makes this even worse! The Guanglu Temple is in charge of the imperial banquets and palace meals, yet they let their own grandson eat hotpot the night before the exam?! And spicy hotpot at that?!】

【Oh… sorry, Deputy Minister Wan, I wrongly accused you. You even forbade him from eating his favorite pepper-salt crackers, afraid it would upset his stomach. Who could’ve predicted he’d sneak out and climb over the wall to eat hotpot?】

The Deputy Minister of Guanglu Temple, who had just confidently said, “They’re all grown men. They can take care of themselves,” downed a cup of wine in frustration and growled, “Eat, eat, eat! All he knows is eating! He might as well just die in that exam hall from diarrhea!”

The official next to him—Langzhong of the Ministry of Personnel’s Examination Office—let out a sympathetic sigh. Thank goodness my cousin isn’t greedy for food.

After thinking for a moment, he decided to console his colleague.

“Deputy Minister Wan, well… young people love food. At least this is a learning experience. He can try again in three years—he’ll surely pass then!”

Deputy Minister Wan let out a long sigh, his brows deeply furrowed. “But he’s already twenty-seven! Forget twenty-seven, when I was seven, my mother was in confinement, and I was the one washing clothes, cooking, and making fires at home. I already knew that if I ate something bad, I wouldn’t be able to do my chores.”

The Langzhong swallowed back the words, “That’s because your family raised you like a wooden log to be beaten into shape, while his family raised him like a precious golden treasure. How can it be the same?” Instead, he simply patted Deputy Minister Wan on the shoulder, hoping he would accept his fate.

【Huh? Why is someone sneaking a smile in the exam hall? What did they see?】

【Oh wow! Someone actually fell for the traps ‘Hotel Fierce Dog’ and ‘Pharmacy Flying Dragon’? I didn’t even come up with obscure ones. Minister Li even suggested including ‘Lord’s Wife Desires Goods’—if I hadn’t vetoed it, half the candidates would have been tricked!】

【Laughing like that… don’t tell me he thinks those two idioms are about aphrodisiacs?】

【He really does!】

“Hahahahahaha—”

The Langzhong of the Ministry of Personnel’s Examination Office pounded the Deputy Minister of Guanglu Temple’s shoulder, laughing uncontrollably. “Sir Xu and the Minister of War are too mischievous, deliberately coming up with questions like this. If someone gets them wrong and later becomes our colleague, I’ll be able to laugh at him for life.”

Another official was also doubled over with laughter. “‘Pharmacy Flying Dragon’ is one thing. It does appear in Yuefu Poems, but it’s indeed uncommon. But ‘Hotel Fierce Dog’ is from Yan Zi Chun Qiu! How in the world did he associate it with aphrodisiacs?”

The Deputy Minister of Guanglu Temple finally shifted his attention away from his grandson and gave a subtle smile. “I suppose even the phrase ‘A lord’s dog is fierce; a man carries a vessel and enters’ could be twisted into some other meaning.”

The Langzhong of the Examination Office burst out laughing. “Twisted into what? Don’t tell me—‘A man carries a vessel, fierce like a male dog’?”

【How tragic. And he’s from my own department too. This poor Langzhong spent three whole months—three months!—reviewing with his cousin, only for his cousin to give him this grand surprise. Hahahahaha! He actually thought ‘Hotel Fierce Dog’ meant a man taking medicine and going wild like a raging dog in an inn—hahahahahaha!】

The Langzhong’s laughter suddenly stopped. “Bang, bang, bang—” He started banging his head against a pillar.

The other officials quickly grabbed him. “It’s not worth it! It’s not worth it!”

The Langzhong struggled desperately. “Let me go! Just let me die! Three months! I tutored him for three months! ‘Hotel Fierce Dog’ simply means that a fierce dog guarding an inn scared off all the customers, causing the wine to sit and turn sour. Such a basic allusion—how could he forget it?!”

“I—I—I might as well just die! Wuuu—”

The other officials hurried to console him. “Calm down, calm down. If he forgot this one, maybe he remembered the others?”

The Langzhong wiped his tears. “That’s true…”

【Hahahahahaha—】

【How did he think ‘Mèimèi wǒ sī zhī’ (Dimly, I ponder it) was a case of phonetic substitution between ‘昧’ (mèi, dim) and ‘妹’ (mèi, younger sister)?!】

【‘Little sister, I miss you’—hahahahahaha!】

【Big brother, you got it wrong~】

The Langzhong: “……”

The Langzhong: “……”

The Langzhong: “……”

And then, with a wail—he burst into tears.